Some Things I’ve Learned

I wanted to take a moment to thank everyone who has sent me private messages of concern following my relapse.

I don’t have the time to write a full blog entry today, since relapses have the weird side effect of making one’s house very, very messy….and my husband returns home on Friday.  He has been very supportive regarding my relapse, but coming home after a month to a six-foot deep pile of dirty…very dirty…laundry might finally send him right over the fucking edge.

In the short amount of time I have to write this, I think I want to share one of the main things I’ve learned from this relapse:

If you’ve done meth in the past and it ended really badly, if you do it again it will end even worse for you.

This was really surprising to me, which is why I’m sharing that information with you so you can share it with others. It’s the least I can do to atone for my stupidity and the pain and worry i’ve caused so many people who love me.  I like to think of myself as an intelligent man, but I’m still learning things every day.  I’m going to quickly share some other things I’ve learned recently so you can avoid the consequences I’ve endured from engaging in these  seemingly harmless activities:

1.  Some floor cleaners smell a lot like a Lemon Drop cocktail, but taste really fucking bad and will give you a sore throat.

2. Certain glass items are really shiny like hard candy but – strangely –  they will make your mouth bleed  if you eat them. Weird, right?

3. You will cut yourself approximately 65% of the time if you use scissors to open tuna cans.

4. Rattlesnakes may look all cuddly and snuggly and shit, but they hate being kissed on the mouth.

5. Those bug fogger things will only make your head cold worse if you try to use them as a vaporizer.

6.  It’s really awesome that God made so many metal items that will fit into power outlets, but if you stick a cocktail fork into one it will be super painful.

7. Pomegranate juice is a really great anti-oxidant, but you should only use water with a neti-pot.

I hope you find all of this helpful, especially the don’t do meth one.  I’ll continue to report to you as I discover additional things that aren’t good or safe activities.

Have a lovely day….off to get the garden hose so I can clean the hardwood floors for my husband. He’s going to be so happy with how shiny I’m going to get them!

And again, thank you ALL for your concern. I’m struggling, but at least I’m still moving.  Have a beautiful day.

About andy nicastro

I'm a producer, writer, graphic designer, former overachiever, current procrastinator and occasional catastrophic fuckupper living in Los Angeles.

Posted on August 28, 2013, in addiction, Crystal Meth, drugs, recovery, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 10 Comments.

  1. Hi Andy,

    I’ve read a number of your blogs and been moved by your story, your honesty, your experiences, your insight. I’m really sorry to hear about your recent relapse and I really hope you’ll be able to get back on track quickly and keep writing and sharing. You clearly have a lot to offer here and elsewhere.


  2. Hannah McPherson


  3. Love you… “Got to be strong… Got to keep on keepin’ on!” xo

  4. I have been away for a bit, Andy, so I didn’t know you had a relapse. But I check your blog from time to time because I like your writing and you write some interesting stuff here..
    .I wish you all the best!

  5. I didn’t know, Andy. I’m so very sorry. But I’m happy you’re getting back on track. Love you, sucka!

  6. I didn’t know, Andy. I’m so sorry. But I’m glad to hear you’re getting back on track. Love you.

  7. I hope you crack yourself up as much as you crack me up because laughter is some of the best medicine. I found you when I read My Jesus Looks Like Jean-Paul Belmondo and as crazy as it sounds I have come to care about you. I keep you in my thoughts and prayers and always hope good things for you. Hang in there cause you deserve good things!

  8. Marty Lindberg

    Andy – when did you have a relapse – all your photos you look so healthy & happy!

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